Classic SNL Review: January 24, 1981: Robert Hays / Joe “King” Carrasco & The Crown, 14 Karat Soul (S06E08)

RATINGS SYSTEM
***** – Classic
****    - Great
***      - Good / Average
**        - Meh
*          - Bad

OPENING: AMERICA NOT HELD HOSTAGE ANYMORE
-Following the release of the hostages, Ted Koppel (Joe Piscopo) keeps Nightline on the air by counting down the days the hostages are out of captivity.
-Nothing outstanding, but decent satire of the news media’s tendency to milk a story, which would be done better for Buckwheat Buys The Farm two years latter.  Actually, so would Piscopo’s Koppel (still not really a fan of the impression, though).
-I did like Koppel positioning the freeing of the hostages as the tragedy, and there was a little bit of scattered applause for the line about harassing the victims’ families.  Ann Risley’s part seemed pretty unnecessary, though.
**1/2

MONOLOGUE
-Robert Hays draws attention to an instant Nielsen rating that appears on the screen, which goes down once he starts bad-mouthing Nielsen families.
-Not a bad concept, and they ended it when it needed to, but this was way too similar to Buck Henry’s May 1979 monologue (thanks to TheLazenby for calling that) and not as well-executed.
**

COMMERCIAL: DAZOLA
-Indian (Denny Dillon) speaks highly of the spread that’s low on cholesterol and high on psylocibin.  Really highly.
-A spoof on the “You call it corn, we call it maize” Mazola commercials, right down to the tagline (“You call them mushrooms.  We call them magic”), but is essentially one big drug joke on par with Dopenhagen from the David Carradine show.
-What amused me more than anything was the goofy facial expressions on vegetable costumed Yvonne Hudson, Matthew Laurance and Gilbert Gottfried.  I wonder who got stuck in the pea outfits.
-Incidentally, the actual Mazola commercial they spoof is in my recording of last week’s show.
**

SHOW: LOVE AMERICAN STYLE
-In “Love and the Celebrity” by Sid “Slappy” White, Robert Hays gets companionship on a lonely promotional tour when an inflatable prostitute (voice of Gail Matthius) appears.
-Another merely OK bit, largely carried by the timing of the string pulls and the reactions from Robert.  The predictable ending was made up for by the strong sight gag of an inflatable pimp.
**1/2

SHOW: SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE SPORTS CENTRAL
-Matthew Laurance interviews Asteroids champ Eddie Atari (Eddie Murphy) from inside his ship, and witnesses him lay waste to flying saucers and the Goodyear blimp.
-Piscopo’s sports anchor persona anchors this sketch, and gets some amusing material with his overpoetic descriptions of Eddie Atari’s Asteroids technique, but once again Murphy walks away with the whole sketch, doing more with relatively few and succinct lines than either Piscopo or Laurance.
-Piscopo’s “Oh, the humanity!”  got some laughs and applause.  I’m wondering when Herbert Morrison’s quote from the Hindenberg became a common pop-culture trope: I know it was used in WKRP’s “Turkeys Away” show (probably the best-ever example of it in pop-culture, IMO), but right now it’s so common it’s cliché.
***

COMMERCIAL: REAGANCO
-Celebrate the new Reagan administration with decorative and cosmetic products by Reaganco.
-Written by Ferris Butler with assistance from Jeremy Stevens.
-Not bad, although the amount of ridiculous products that have been legitimately marketed to capitalize on the Obama inauguration make this one seem quaint in comparison.
-The audience really liked the line about the rouge that made even a corpse come alive.  Cheap, but sometimes cheap works.
***

SHOW: SAVE-A-NETWORK TELETHON
-Joe Piscopo emcees a telethon where viewers are invited to pledge a premise to the struggling network.
-Alright idea, but I found this more interesting for the on-screen appearances of cue card man Al Siegal (playing deli worker Sidney Sharkman), cameraman Al Camoin, and announcer Don Pardo (only his second on the show, and first where he’s introduced as himself).  The audience goes wild for Pardo, and he seems to be enjoying himself, especially while singing.
-One cringeworthy line in the part about Pink Lady & Jeff and Shogun.
-I can’t tell who most of the phone bank volunteers are (the recurring extra with the combover and glasses is one of them), but it looks like Neil Levy on the right side of Gilbert Gottfried’s table.
-I noticed Ann Risley adlibs a “right” after an audience member says “yay” to the NBC peacock sheets she holds up.
***

SHOW: PRE-SUPERBOWL PRE-GAME PREVIEW
-A panel (Robert Hays, Ann Risley and Charles Rocket) overinflates the importance of tomorrow’s big game.
-Weak.  The main jokes (the hype-up of the game and the football/ballet metaphor) were stretched way past their breaking points, and the final payoff (the anchors don’t even know who are playing tomorrow) underwhelmed.
*1/2

FILM: “THE FOREIGN FILM” – WILLIAM DEAR
-A short segment from “Elephant Parts” features a man (Michael Nesmith) and a woman spouting subtitled gibberish.
-The audience liked this a bit more than the last sketch, but it still suffered from the joke being stretched past the breaking point.  Gibberish is funnier than hyperbole and weak metaphors, though.
**

SKETCH: FUNERAL
-Inappropriate music selections from substitute organist Harry Osborne fit a sports game more than a dignified funeral.
-This was a little predictable once he started playing his first number, but it was silly enough to be worthwhile, largely because of the mourners’ reactions to the music.
-Best part for me was the organ swipe when the widow (Denny Dillon) closed the casket because she didn’t want her husband to hear it.
-I’m still not sure if Harry Osborne is a real person or just some outside actor or production staff member; the leading SNL sites list him as a real person so unless I get other information I’m going to treat him like a cameo.
***

WEEKEND UPDATE WITH CHARLES ROCKET & GAIL MATTHIUS
-Best Jokes: Reagan letter (for the graphic), Margaret Trudeau
-Most of the jokes were pretty bad this week (worst: Mondale and Eldridge Cleaver jokes…).  They’re at least curbing the forced chemistry between the anchors (only one attempt this week) and Gail seems to be getting better, although I don’t think anyone could have made the Eldridge Cleaver joke work.  Probably would have been something Brian Doyle-Murray would have done next season.
-Charles Rocket gets a short bit getting an “apology” from the same dummy of Ayatollah Khomeini they used on the show last season (100th show).   Meh.
-Tiffany Fleur (Ann Risley) shows some of her fashions for the engineering student.  A few easy nerd “slide rule” and “pocket protector” jokes but the sight of the pocket protector glued to the one model’s chest woke up the audience.  That’s writer David Hurwitz playing Paul (the bearded guy), while Robert is one of the administrative staff (no name, unfortunately, but it’s the same guy as in Taped Confession).
-Joe Piscopo gets another prop-based Saturday Night Sports, this time predicting the outcome of Super Bowl XV with an electric football game.  The audience liked his dismissal of the Oakland Raiders and Philadelphia Eagles as mediocre teams.
-Eddie Murphy gets the strongest segment, discussing how he was out both reefer and heating oil money thanks to frozen Iranian assets.  Murphy actually tells a few audience members that applaud at the beginning of his commentary to “hold it”.  Good payoff.
**

COMMERCIAL: DISCO MELTDOWN
-Dena Disco (Denny Dillon) invites dancers to watch her change colors from “disco radiation” at her nightclub inside a nuclear reactor.
-Not good.  My main problem with this was that it was a thin premise to begin with, but it didn’t really seem to build on the main joke or have any payoff.  It was also a little too dependent on the greenscreen.  Disco was already on the decline by that point so it dated pretty horribly.  Dillon tried, though.
-The song was written by Dillon, with Kenny Vance and Philip Namanworth.
-Vance is actually one of the dancers, as is Wendie Malick.  I think I see Liz Welch in there, and in the promotional photos for this sketch, you can see Yvonne Hudson and Neil Levy in the crowd.
*

FILM: THE ROCKET REPORT – REAGAN
-From Washington, DC, Charles Rocket tries to show us what a day in the life of the President is like.
-Not one of Rocket’s stronger reports: Rocket is at his best when he’s interacting with other people and this was sorely missed.  It had a few funny moments (Rocket saying the cop in riot gear was Reagan atop his horse “Darky”…though, what’s with the racial jokes tonight?)
**1/2

COMMERCIAL: THE PACESETTER
-Liven up plays killed with slow pacing by administering electric shocks to the actors.
-Once again this was an idea milked a little too long.  I found the button noise a bit irritating as well.  Compared to some of the other material tonight it was merely OK.
**

COMMERCIAL: RAVI SINGS
-Master sitar player Ravi Shankar (Patrick Weathers) has a new album of romantic American ballads.
-I guess the joke is from the juxtaposition of Indian sitar music with American love songs but it really just leaves a bad taste in my mouth, with the brownface makeup and bug-eyes.  The audience seemed to be laughing more at the cartoonish impression than the concept.  It might have played a little better as a photo montage.
-Weathers is lipsyncing to a recorded track here (like Gilda Radner in Stretch Marks).
*

SKETCH: CUT ‘N CURL
-Roweena (Gail Matthius) and Nadine (Denny Dillon) don’t see eye-to-eye on the Reagan inauguration,
-They probably could have used The Pacesetter for this as it felt pretty leaden.   This ended up being weaker than the other Cut ‘N Curl sketch; the asides to the audience just seemed to derail the bit.  Both Matthius and Dillon seem to be having trouble with a few of their lines.
-One thing I didn’t pick up on until someone pointed it out was that Dillon’s wearing the exact same outfit (well, a cheap copy of it) that Nancy Reagan wore to her inauguration a few days before, right down to the hat (which was the subject of a photo joke on tonight’s Weekend Update).
*

MISCELLANEOUS: PROMOTION
-Eddie Murphy announces that he has been promoted to the full cast of “Saturday Night Live”
-Not a rateable segment, but the audience seemed to think Murphy deserved his promotion.  Funny visual gag with the rings, sunglasses and mirror too.

COMMERCIAL: DREAM DATE
-A chance at a $40,000 dream date with your ideal partner and location has just one particular step…
-The only joke is the $40,000 in cash that Rocket goes on about being a part of the dream date is supplied by the contestants themselves.
*

COMMERCIAL: ORDINARY ELEPHANT PEOPLE
-The new movie with a family as disfigured internally as they are on the outside.
-My recording is missing this sketch (damn Comedy Network didn’t run short station break segments), but the transcript makes it sound like one of the more worthwhile bits tonight.  I can’t actually rate it until I see it, though (Canadian Netflix only has seasons 20-35, and I can’t access Hulu).

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE: “I WISH THAT WE WERE MARRIED”, “THIS TIME IT’S FOR REAL” – 14 KARAT SOUL
-After the last group of segments, this was more than welcome.  An excellent a capella performance; the audience response was so huge that it actually delayed the start of the second number (you can see Glenny T. Wright start to snap his fingers for a few beats before stopping).  The second song had the audience clapping along.
-I wonder why they had both musical guests scheduled so late in the show (after the 12:30 station break)

SKETCH: NATIONAL ENQUIRER
-Editors of the tabloid work on compiling stories for the latest issue.
-Another mostly laugh-free sketch that dragged on for  a little too long.  It felt a little like they were going for going for shock/bad taste jokes (cartoon of a man throwing his wife into a treeshredder, “cripples are big now”, romantically linking Desi Arnaz Sr. with Jr.).
-Rocket was doing a character voice for his role but it took me out of the sketch.
*

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE: “DONT BUG ME BABY” – JOE “KING” CARRASCO & THE CROWN
-For the longest time, I thought this was terrible, but now I’m actually starting to enjoy it.  Most if it is from how entertaining the performance is: Carrasco goes wild here, jumping off amps and diving into the audience.  Music-wise it was pretty raw: I thought the guitar was the weak link, but the main things driving the song were Kris Cummings’ organ and Brad Kizer’s drumming.  This brought the energy up in a show that really needed it.

GOODNIGHTS
-Robert Hays almost accidentally exposes Gail Matthius’ left breast.
-Don Pardo does not announce an upcoming host but continues to show off his singing ability.

Final Thoughts:
I actually was a little taken aback at how weak the show was when I rewatched it.  After last week’s strong episode, this one started off as somewhat of a step down to “business as usual” before crashing after weekend Weekend Update.  I wonder if it was they were exhausted from pulling off three live shows in a row or if there was another factor.  What’s unmistakable is how much dreck comes in the second half of the show, and how much it makes the musical performances seem like a relief.   Hays really didn’t distinguish himself either way.  Even the usually reliable “Rocket Report” was sub par.  I think the biggest disappointment about this episode is that the cast and writers already proved themselves as capable as last week: it felt almost like this is the point where the bad press is starting to seep in.

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:
-Eddie Murphy’s segments in his sketches.  I know it’s a lazy way to list highlights, but this week it really felt like he was the only thing in the show that was really standing out (aside from the music performances), and he managed to do more to make the audience laugh in three short appearances than everyone else who had more airtime tonight.

EPISODE LOWLIGHTS:
-Ravi Sings
-Disco Meltdown
-Dream Date
-National Enquirer
-Cut ‘N Curl
-Pre-Super Bowl Pre-Game Preview
-The Pacesetter
-Dazola
-Monologue
-The Foreign Film

MVP:
Eddie Murphy, 14 Karat Soul

CAST & GUEST BREAKDOWN
cast
Denny Dillon: 4 appearances [Dazola, Funeral, Disco Meltdown, Cut 'N Curl]
Gilbert Gottfried: 5 appearances [Dazola, Save-A-Network Telethon,  Funeral, Ordinary Elephant People, National Enquirer]
Gail Matthius: 4 appearances [Monologue, Save-A-Network Telethon, Weekend Update, Cut 'N Curl], 1 voiceover [Love American Style]
Joe Piscopo: 6 appearances [America Not Held Hostage Anymore, Saturday Night Live Sports Central, Save-A-Network Telethon, Weekend Update, The Pacesetter, National Enquirer], 2 voice-overs [Ravi Sings, Ordinary Elephant People]
Ann Risley: 6 appearances [America Not Held Hostage Anymore, Save-A-Network Telethon, Pre-Superbowl Pre-Game Preview, Weekend Update, The Pacesetter, Ordinary Elephant People]
Charles Rocket: 8 appearances [Reaganco, Pre-Superbowl Pre-Game Preview, Funeral, Weekend Update, Rocket Report, The Pacesetter, Dream Date, Ordinary Elephant People, National Enquirer], 2 voiceovers [America Not Held Hostage Anymore, Save-A-Network Telethon]

featured players
Yvonne Hudson (uncredited): 2 appearances [Dazola, Disco Meltdown]
Matthew Laurance: 4 appearances [Dazola, Saturday Night Live Sports Central, Funeral, National Enquirer]
Eddie Murphy: 3 appearances [Saturday Night Live Sports Central, Weekend Update, Promotion]
Patrick Weathers: 2 appearances [Ravi Sings, National Enquirer]

confirmed non-cast
Al Camoin: 1 appearance [Save-A-Network Telethon]
David Hurwitz: 1 appearance [Weekend Update]
Neil Levy: 2 appearances [Save-A-Network Telethon, Disco Meltdown]
Wendie Malick: 1 appearance [Disco Meltown]
Andy Murphy: 1 appearance [Funeral]
Don Pardo: 1 appearance [Save-A-Network Telethon]
Kenny Vance: 1 appearance [Disco Meltdown]
(any confirmation that’s Liz Welch?)

guests
Robert Hays: 5 appearances [Monologue, Love American Style, Pre-Superbowl Pre-Game Preview, The Pacesetter, National Enquirer]
14 Karat Soul: 1 appearance ["I Wish That We Were Married/This Time It's For Real"]
Joe “King” Carrasco & The Crown: 1 appearance ["Don't Bug Me Baby"]
Michael Nesmith: 1 appearance [The Foreign Film]
Harry Osborne: 1 appearance [Funeral]

REBROADCAST HISTORY:
Not rebroadcast on NBC.

Additional screen captures of this episode can be found here.

Classic SNL Review: December 20, 1980: David Carradine / The cast of “The Pirates of Penzance” (S06E05)

RATINGS SYSTEM:
***** – Classic
****   – Great
***     – Good / Average
**       – Meh
*         – Awful

COLD OPENING: PARDO IMPRESSION
-Backstage, Joe Piscopo works on his Don Pardo impression to potentially get an extra paycheck.
-A very short “blackout” cold opening with very little audience reaction.  For what it was, though, it wasn’t painful.
-They seem to be carrying on the original cast’s running joke of Pardo being this disembodied voice (see Waiting For Pardo, Don Pardo: The First 50 Years), now with added omniscience. -I can’t really say I’m a fan of Piscopo’s impression: like with a lot of Piscopo impressions it’s mitigated by too much of Piscopo’s natural voice tone.
**

MONTAGE
-After two and a half seasons as an uncredited bit player, Yvonne Hudson is credited for the first time as a featured player.

MONOLOGUE
-David Carradine sings “I Want To Be A Dancin’ Man” and deflects Charles Rocket’s protests that SNL is for comedy, not soft-shoe.
-Carradine seems to be ad-libbing a lot here: at one point, he says “I’m supposed to say this really fast”, and when the joke about his father saying “no son of mine is going to make a living with his feet” got no reaction, he says “that didn’t work”.  He even says “Just reading the cards, that’s all”.
-The rumors say he under the influence that night, but  he actually doesn’t do too badly in the monologue.  The musical number was entertaining to watch, and him (literally) kicking Charles Rocket off the stage got a good reaction.
***

COMMERCIAL: GUN CITY
-Crazy Eddie-style pitchman (Joe Piscopo) recommends weapons as Christmas gifts.
-Short and carried by Piscopo’s manic delivery.  This benefits from having a few good lines, most notably a dig at Nancy Reagan with the “teeny-weeny guns” line.
-After watching a few real Crazy Eddie ads, I can appreciate Piscopo’s impression a little better.
***

SKETCH: KUNG FU MENSWEAR
-Caine’s (David Carradine) journeys lead him to a black menswear shop and conflicting fashion advice from its owner (Eddie Murphy) and Master Po (Gilbert Gottfried).
-David Carradine is a mess here, constantly looking at the cue cards and mumbling his lines.  His delivery actually bungles a lot of the funnier jokes.   Eddie Murphy does his best to carry the sketch, but despite his efforts (particularly the reactions) the sketch falls apart due to pacing problems, a weak ending and a badly cued music sting.
-Gilbert Gottfried appears heavily made-up as Master Po from Kung Fu, although not really doing an impression so much as talking in an ominous tone of voice.  He gets some good lines, and the characterization as slightly annoyed and contemptuous of Caine was good for a few chuckles.
-This was the first of three Kung Fu segments in the show.  Ferris Butler confirms they were going for working in Cain throughout the show as much as possible.
-Does anyone else find the “coming up” gag at the very end (Babes in Thailand) has a little bit of an unintentional irony considering where Carradine died?
**

SKETCH: CEDAR MALL
-Vickie (Gail Matthius) and Debbie (Denny Dillon) try to impress some guys (Charles Rocket and Joe Piscopo) at the mall.
-Matthius is especially good here, particularly when she recounts her conversation with the guy with a string of “and he said, and I said…”
-Despite the audience not really being into this one (except for Rocket’s little garbage throw routine), I thought it was a good low-key sketch.
-I can see Yvonne Hudson in the background; I wonder if any of the other extras were writers.
***

FILM: THE ROCKET REPORT: SANTA CLAUS
-Charles Rocket talks glowingly about Jolly Old St. Nick while a derelict Santa (also Rocket) stumbles around New York.
-A bit short of the better Rocket Reports.  What makes them work is Rocket’s interactions with other people, and while there was a little of it with Santa hitting on women and lighting up with a fellow pedestrian, it took a backseat to the juxtaposition of Rocket’s effusive narration and Santa’s seedier activities.
-This is the first appearance of the “skyline” title card that would be used for the Rocket Report for the rest of the season.
***

SKETCH: DYLAN & GUTHRIE
-Bob Dylan (Patrick Weathers) cribs ailing hero Woody Guthrie’s (David Carradine) conversation during a hospital visit.
-This is a genuinely good sketch with a solid premise and strong performances from Weathers, who does a very good “young Dylan”, and Carradine.
-Nice little detail: Dylan’s “This machine kills facists [sic] too!” on his guitar.
****

COMMERCIAL: THE HOME VERSION OF DALLAS
-Dysfunctional family drama can be made entertaining just by pretending you’re the characters from the prime-time soap.
-This was brief but amusing, particularly the visual of the dysfunctional family wearing the cowboy hats and wigs.
***

FILM: “MR. BILL’S CHRISTMAS SPECIAL” – WALTER WILLIAMS
-A now homeless Mr. Bill reflects on Yuletide mangling at the hands of Mr. Hands and Sluggo.
-Best mangling: Sled, bike spokes
-A little short of the classic Mr. Bill segments from the original cast years.  This Mr. Bill has a (relatively) happier ending, with all of Mr. Bill’s dismemberment happening solely in flashbacks.  Then again, Mr. Bill, Miss Sally and Spot are homeless during the winter…
-I wonder if this segment was originally made for the previous season, because some of the clips (the train set, Sluggo In A Box and the sled) were in “Mr. Bill Gets Help” from the Teri Garr episode eleven months before.  I can even hear some of the same dialogue in the clips under the voiceovers in “Gets Help”.  This would make sense in the story timeline too.
***

COMMERCIAL: KUNG-FU CHRISTMAS
-Caine (David Carradine) and Bruce Lee (Eddie Murphy) battle evil Santas in a Christmas movie trailer.
-This worked in spite of itself: it was a fairly weak idea and the whole thing seemed kind of slapped together at the last minute, but I thought that actually kind of made it a bit funnier.
-I couldn’t help but laugh at “Bruce Lee is back, but this time he’s black!” and Master Po saying “You must kick their butts, grasshopper” in that tone of voice.
-Gottfried’s last sketch of the night.
**1/2

WEEKEND UPDATE WITH CHARLES ROCKET
-Best jokes: Rupert Murdoch apologizes, Ronald Reagan resigns.
-Short Update tonight.  Including the two commentaries, this clocks in at about 5 1/2 minutes, and was likely truncated to make room for the musical performances.  Rocket had a comparatively good week this time.  Was the Rupert Murdoch joke the first SNL mention of the Australian mogul?
-Ann Risley’s holiday tips that revolve around suggesting “lard wrapped in a plastic bag” come off as an attempt at weird humor that may have worked a little better with a different performer.  I still can’t decide whether it’s bad, or so bad it’s good.
-Joe Piscopo has a brief Saturday Night Sports about the NFL on NBC’s “silent game” that aired earlier that day, criticizing Don Ohlmeyer for how boring it really was, and demonstrating what it would be like if applied to his own segment.  This is more notable for Piscopo creating more of a character for his Saturday Night Sports persona (as a poorly paid counterpart to real-life sportscasters) and doing a Christmas greeting in the same style as his intros.
**1/2

MUSIC PERFORMANCE: PENZANCE MEDLEY: “I AM THE VERY MODEL OF A MODERN MAJOR GENERAL”, “OH, IS THERE NOT ONE MAIDEN BREAST”, “POOR WANDERING ONE!”, “WHERE THE FOREMAN BARES HIS STEEL” – THE CAST OF “THE PIRATES OF PENZANCE” FEATURING LINDA RONSTADT, REX SMITH, & GEORGE ROSE
-This was a very interesting idea to actually book the cast of a Broadway show as musical guest.  It was a little difficult to crowd all these people on the tiny SNL home base stage (especially in “Where The Foreman Bares His Steel”) but it makes me wish SNL would do something like this again with a musical guest booking.
-The scheduling in the show was wisely done: usually SNL musical performances are done before Weekend Update, but this longer performance flows better in the show here.

SKETCH: HEROIN IN HARLEM
-Rich white drug users (Joe Piscopo, Charles Rocket, Ann Risley and Gail Matthius) seeking the “real experience” go to Harlem for their heroin.
-While the rich drug users’ characterizations seemed a little too cartoonish for my liking, I actually thought this was a decent sketch with a good payoff at the end, the black junkies actually being undercover cops.  I liked the visual of Rocket taking a picture of the pusher threatening Matthius with a knife at her throat.
-Eddie Murphy’s line ends the sketch on a strong note:  ”Look — I am SICK AND TIRED of you junkies coming up and giving Harlem a bad name! You should have STAYED on Park Avenue where you belong!”
-One line, “you’re probably the kind of guy who worries about dirty needles” takes on a whole new light since the AIDS crisis began.  This actually aired less than six months before the disease was first reported.
***

FILM: “VIRGIN SEARCH” – LINDA LEE
-NBC executives (Neil Levy, Matthew Laurance, Mitchel Kriegman) search for the next female SNL cast member takes them from Anytown, USA to Paris to Rome to LA, all in search of a virgin.
-This is the film that was originally the subject of the big battle with standards for the Burstyn show; I don’t know if there was anything that was altered for it to finally air on the Carradine show.  I’d say it was alright but not particularly memorable.
-Gail Matthius gets a good workout, having to play four different characters, including an all-American cheerleader, a Parisian schoolgirl, a Roman Catholic nun and a version of herself with garish New Wave makeup and a Carl Sagan obsession.
-The joke with the Parisian schoolgirl not being a virgin because of Roman Polanski was a little tasteless, but the nun’s “Damn you, Father Sarducci” got a good response.
-Does anyone have an ID for the actor who played the network president?  He looks very familiar: I think they actually got a local character actor instead of using show personnel like they normally do for small roles.
**1/2

COMMERCIAL: DOPENHAGEN & HAPPY DAZE
-Country singer (David Carradine) gets his THC from a dipping tobacco-like product.  Now with a starter variety for the kids.
-Weaker segment.  While Heroin in Harlem was also a drug bit, it had a bit more substance than just substituting marijuana for chewing tobacco.  This commercial really didn’t have any more to it than that.
-Carradine’s delivery was off (he even says Copenhagen instead of Dopenhagen at first).
**

SKETCH: MOURNING THE COLONEL
-Chicken lovers (David Carradine, Denny Dillon, Eddie Murphy) grieve the passing of fried chicken icon Colonel Sanders.
-This wasn’t a bad idea for a topical sketch; kind of understated, with good work from all three (and one of Carradine’s better performances that night).
-This uses the same mall set as the Vicki and Debbie sketch from earlier tonight.
***

FILM: “THE DANCING MAN” – MITCHELL KRIEGMAN
-Hungover man (Bill Irwin) compulsively boogies whenever presented with “Shake Your Groove Thing”.
-This was good, carried entirely by Irwin’s skill as a mime; there is not a line of dialogue in the whole segment.
***1/2

SKETCH: KUNG-FU WELFARE
-Unemployed Caine (David Carradine) and Ms. Robley (Yvonne Hudson) are literally pimped out due to changes to their welfare requirements.
-Written by Ferris Butler, Billy Brown & Mel Green.
-This had the best premise of the three Kung Fu parodies, a good spoof of government doublespeak, and Dillon was good as the dismissive bureaucrat.
-I kind of liked the bits of business with Caine (still seeking water) not entirely sure what to do with the water cooler.
-Yvonne Hudson gets her first prominent role as a credited featured player, despite doing some fairly major sketch work the season before (“Bad Clams”).
-Carradine blanking out towards the end (“I am troubled by one thing, um…”) and Denny asking the question for him did not seem scripted.  It did derail the sketch, unfortunately, and the sketch never quite recovers.
-The last exchange between Carradine and Risley’s character is probably one of the dirtiest things I can think of them getting away with this season (think “water sports”).
**1/2

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE: “O COME EMANUEL”, “THE FIRST NOEL”, “JOY TO THE WORLD”
-This was a nice touch, with the Penzance cast performing a capella (the only bit of instrumentation is the organ playing the key change for each new song), and snow beginning to fall for Joy To The World.

GOODNIGHTS
-David Carradine, the cast, and the Penzance performers are all crowded on or below home base.  Gilbert Gottfried is still in his Master Po robes.
-Don Pardo announces the show will return live on January 10th, and that he’ll be spending New Years’ at Art Fleming’s, snorting potpourri.

Final Summary:
This was a surprisingly consistant show, with no truly awful segments (at the very worst, the weaker segments were either forgettable or just not strongly executed) and one very strong sketch (“Dylan & Guthrie”).  Carradine wasn’t exactly a great host, though, and is responsible for derailing the Kung Fu Menswear and Kung Fu Welfare sketches, though he did alright in most of what else he was in.  That said, the show seemed to move quickly and was actually pretty enjoyable for the most part.  This is the last show before a significant upheaval backstage, though, with Mason Williams and Mitchell Kriegman out, and Jeremy Stevens and Tom Moore in by the next show.

MVP:
Gail Matthius

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:
-Dylan & Guthrie
-The Dancing Man

EPISODE LOWLIGHTS:
-Ann Risley’s WU commentary
-Dopenhagen & Happy Daze
-Kung Fu Menswear
-Pardo Impression

CAST & GUEST SUMMARY:
cast
Denny Dillon: 4 appearances [Cedar Mall, The Home Version of Dallas, Mourning the Colonel, Kung Fu Welfare]
Gilbert Gottfried: 2 appearances [Kung Fu Menswear, Kung Fu Christmas]
Gail Matthius: 5 appearances [Cedar Mall, The Home Version of Dallas, Kung Fu Christmas, Heroin In Harlem, Virgin Search]
Joe Piscopo: 6 appearances [Pardo Impression, Gun City, Cedar Mall, The Home Version of Dallas, Weekend Update, Heroin in Harlem]
Ann Risley: 5 appearances [Pardo Impression, Dylan & Guthrie, Weekend Update, Heroin In Harlem, Kung Fu Welfare]
Charles Rocket: 7 appearances [Monologue, Cedar Mall, The Rocket Report, The Home Version of Dallas, Weekend Update, Heroin In Harlem, Kung Fu Welfare]; 1 voiceover [Kung Fu Christmas]

featured players
Yvonne Hudson: 1 appearance [Kung Fu Welfare]
Matthew Laurance:  1 appearance [Virgin Search]
Eddie Murphy:  4 appearances [Kung Fu Menswear, Kung Fu Christmas, Heroin In Harlem, Mourning the Colonel]
Patrick Weathers: 1 appearance [Dylan & Guthrie]

non-cast
Mitchell Kriegman: 1 appearance [Virgin Search]
Neil Levy: 1 appearance [Virgin Search]
Andy Murphy: 1 appearance [Kung Fu Christmas]
Don Pardo: 1 voiceover [Pardo Impression]

guests
David Carradine: 7 appearances [Monologue, Kung Fu Menswear, Dylan & Guthrie, Kung Fu Christmas, Dopenhagen & Happy Daze, Mourning the Colonel, Kung Fu Welfare]
The cast of “The Pirates of Penzance”: 2 appearances [Penzance medley, Christmas carols]
Bill Irwin: 1 appearance [The Dancing Man]

REBROADCAST HISTORY:
February 28, 1981

Additional screen captures not shown above can be found here.

Classic SNL Review: November 22, 1980: Malcolm McDowell / Captain Beefheart & The Magic Band (S06E02)

RATING SYSTEM:
***** – Classic
****   – Great
***     – Good / Average
**       – Meh
*         – Bad

COLD OPENING: EXECUTION
-A remorseful condemned man (Gilbert Gottfried) is lead to the electric chair.  His mother (Denny Dillon) is allowed one last word for him: “Sit up straight!”.
-The audience was completely silent for this.  At best a lame blackout bit, but the way it was performed in the lead-up to the punchline was far too real and grim for it to work, particularly Gottfried remorsefully saying “I’m sorry, Father” over and over again.
-Where was this performed?  It doesn’t look like it was done inside the studio or even the halls outside of  8H.
*

MONOLOGUE
-Malcolm McDowell explains his difficulties getting a new work permit almost stopped him from hosting tonight’s show.
-This is pretty much a straightforward “talk” monologue.  A lot of people take issue with the story not really being humorous in any way but it seems like your typical early years “introduction” monologue without a comedy routine.
-Of note is that McDowell mentions his marriage to an American woman and that he’s about to become the proud father of an American baby.  The “American woman” in question is Mary Steenburgen, whom McDowell was married to from 1980 to 1990.  Their baby Lilly would be born January 31 of the next year, while younger son Charlie, born two years later, would later go on to create the blog/Twitter feed Dear Girls Above Me.
**

SHOW: MUTUALLY OMAHA’S WILD KINGDOM
-Marlin Perkins (Charles Rocket) narrates “In Search Of The Negro Republican”, in which Jim Fowler (Joe Piscopo) infiltrates a cocktail party.
-Written by Barry W. Blaustein and David Sheffield.
-Not particularly funny, but an amusing concept with OK execution and a few chuckles here and there, particularly the false alarm where a potential Republican is merely the owner of a funeral home.
-Rocket shows that he’s not really an impressionist with Marlin Perkins, something that becomes more evident as the season goes on.
-This sketch is notable for being the SNL debut of future featured player and cast member Eddie Murphy, seen here as just a lowly extra.  Also visible are other eventual featured players Yvonne Hudson, a bit player from the previous few seasons, and Matthew Laurance, twin brother of former SNL staffer and future “Not Necessarily The News” cast member Mitchell Laurance (incidentally, SNL ’80 writers Larry Arnstein and David Hurwitz would eventually write for NNTN).
-The main role of the “negro Republican” was played by an unidentified middle-aged day player.  He wasn’t that great with delivering the lines, though.  If anyone can identify the actor or any other extras I have missed, please leave a comment.
**1/2

COMMERCIAL: TOBACCO GROWER’S ASSOCIATION
-Joseph Richman (Gilbert Gottfried) says that lungs are the reason people get lung cancer, not cigarettes.
-The first segment that was actually funny in tonight’s show, largely thanks to Gilbert Gottfried’s slow-burn as the oily Tobacco representative.  He’s still a little green as a performer here and doesn’t fully come off as comfortable in front of the camera first, but you definitely see the hints of what was to come in his career.
-I enjoyed Gottfried accusing the lung of intentionally trapping cigarette smoke and chiding it for not being able to get rid of smoke like his 7-year-old daughter’s fan can.  I also chuckled at the “persons without lungs need not worry” line when the lung was going to be recalled.
-There’s a blooper at the very beginning where Jan & Dean’s “Surf City” (for the next sketch’s opening title) starts playing for a few seconds before shutting off.  The Comedy Central 60-minute edit cuts this out.
***1/2

SKETCH: SERF CITY
-In feudal times, Lord Jack (Charles Rocket) shows an Earl (Malcolm McDowell) a new way to abuse peasants: stand on their backs and ride them while wenches (Gail Matthius and Ann Risley) tickle them with feathers.
-A pun-filled sketch that didn’t get as many laughs as it wanted to.  In fact, the first thing people laughed at were the names of the sexy wenches: Bingo and Moondoggy.  McDowell was largely used for setups while Rocket got the “laugh” lines.
-The ending where Rocket rejects McDowell’s idea of riding actual waves felt like a pale imitation of Franken & Davis’  Theodoric of York.  I did chuckle slightly at the serfs groaning “oh no…” off-camera.
-Any idea who was playing the serfs?  Neil Levy’s one of them.  Can’t place the other two.
*1/2

SKETCH: ADOPTED AMY CARTER
-Amy Carter (Denny Dillon) prefers being raised in privilege by new parents Ronald (Charles Rocket) and Nancy Reagan (Gail Matthius).
-The audience woke up for this one and relatively speaking, one of the stronger moments in tonight’s show.   A little cute, but the audience got a kick out of little Amy’s hatred for grits and calling her grandmother a dope and her parents losers.
-My favorite bit was a call-back to Amy saying she hates riding the bus earlier in the sketch: when she hides under the table when her parents call, she yells “Tell them I rode the bus!”  I also liked the look Rocket shot Dillon when she has the line about wearing make-up like him.
-Not everything works, though.  They seemed to be reaching with the “Uncle Bert was indicted!” (Bert Lance scandal in 1977) and “Uncle Hamilton eats powdered donuts!” (a reference to the alleged cocaine use of Hamilton Jordan).
-Charles Rocket and Gail Matthius debut their Ronald and Nancy Reagan impressions.  Rocket doesn’t wear a Reagan wig this time out and appears to be wearing a minimal bit of old man makeup, while talking in a gravelly voice.  Matthius speaks slowly and exaggeratedly.  Dillon does her exaggerated Amy Carter but it brings the energy level of the sketch up, and she’s at least giving an effort.
-This is the last time we see Gail Matthius all night, and her only appearance in the show aside from playing a wench in Serf City.  She’s also visibly glancing at the cue cards quite a bit when reading her lines, which is particularly noticeable at the beginning when she’s sitting at the table across from Rocket.
-The extra who played the negro Republican plays Buster, the Reagans’ servant in this sketch.
***

COMMERCIAL: AMERICAN MILK ASSOCIATION
-Alex De Large (Malcolm McDowell) endorses the stimulation and nutritional value of Moloko Plus.
-This gets a little recognition applause for McDowell in his Clockwork Orange getup, but the whole thing doesn’t come off as well as the idea had the potential to be, and is awkward more than anything else.
-Apparently, the inspiration for this bit was McDowell being offered a half-million to reprise Alex for a milk commercial in Japan (which he turned down).
**

SHORT SHOT: “SHOWDOWN” – KEN FRIEDMAN
-Ned and Sam vie for the affections of Rose with a ultraviolent Peckinpah-esque gun battle.
-Not quite on the level of last week’s film, but an amusing diversion.  The main humor comes from the excessive violence and carnage (complete with slow-mo at one point, definitely a nod to The Wild Bunch) as well as the way the bloodied cowboys nonchalantly walk away from it all when they realize they’re fighting over nothing.
**1/2

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE: “HOT HEAD” – CAPTAIN BEEFHEART & THE MAGIC BAND
-Captain Beefheart’s definitely an acquired taste, but his later stuff is a little easier to get into than Trout Mask Replica.  It’s almost kind of this minimalistic punkish music with a really interesting rhythm.  Actually, almost like a weird square dance.
-You can hear Beefheart’s influence on Tom Waits’ post-Swordfishtrombones output.
-The moment that sticks out is when the guitar starts playing its usual line after Beefheart’s verse only to be drowned out by this high-pitched note from Eric Drew Feldman’s keyboard (Mellotron?)
-You can see people going up the stairs through the window behind Feldman.
-Captain Beefheart was 39 when he appeared on SNL but looks much older; if you see pictures of him from about 10 years earlier it’s even more obvious.  He also appeared to be in the early stages of multiple sclerosis at this time.
-The live show has a brief second after the song ends before the applause starts.  The Comedy Central 60-minute version dubs canned applause over the tail end of the performance.

WEEKEND UPDATE WITH CHARLES ROCKET
-Best joke: Iranian earrings
-Wow, Charles is really having a bad night.  A few line flubs here, but that’s nothing compared to the number of jokes that meet no response from the audience, including the very first one about the Las Vegas fire escapes, or elicit groans, such as the Bob Hope comment on Mary Crosby being the one that shot J.R. or the reactionary violence being a return to “traditional values and morality”.
-The interview with John Lennon (Malcolm McDowell) and Yoko Ono (Denny Dillon) is enjoyable.  Despite Dillon being miscast as Yoko, this had some funny lines (yes, even “Yoko is just loco about my cocoa”) and Lennon’s overdomesticated obsessions with clean dishes and finding a fabric softener that shows his family he loves them.
-My favorite little detail was Yoko pouring the cocoa over the burnt cake Lennon was upset about.
-Apparently the real John and Yoko saw this and got a kick out of it.  According to an interview, McDowell had felt bad for doing the sketch so close to Lennon’s murder but after hearing years later the Lennons enjoyed it, he felt better about it.
-Joe Piscopo gets his first Saturday Night Live Sports feature on Weekend Update.  His delivery is still low-key but he’s starting to get into his usual rhythm.
-Here he comments on the upcoming WBC welterweight championship rematch between Roberto Duran and Sugar Ray Leonard (what would eventually be known as the “No Mas Fight”) using Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots.
-The audience is more awake for this segment, and it’s starting to become clear that while Rocket is the one being groomed for stardom, Piscopo is starting to emerge as the audience favorite.
-Dr. Murray Abramowitz (Gilbert Gottfried) complains about the poorer taste material from last week’s episode in an editorial reply, and suggests SNL’s cast, writers and crew need analysis.  This was not a wise move on the show’s part: by doing this self-deprecating stuff so early when the cast hasn’t really done much to distinguish itself aside from getting negative press, this seems to be giving them the message “you’re right!”  It reminds me of something Kate Beaton (the history comics artist) said about how you can’t really develop a following if you don’t stand behind your own work.
-I did chuckle at “Who writes this show, Hitler?” (in response to all the Jewish jokes in last week’s show).
-Gottfried’s voice in this bit sounds a little like Jerry Seinfeld with a little bit of an exaggerated accent.
**

SKETCH: GOTHIC ROMANCE NOVEL SHOP
-A discerning customer (Ann Risley) hopes the shopkeeper (Malcolm McDowell) fills her precise request for a romance novel.
-Somewhat Pythonesque sketch, and McDowell handled the laundry list variations on Risley’s requests well.  The dialogue seemed better than average too.  Shame the audience was so quiet.  Risley does not seem to do a bad job in this sketch either, which is her only appearance besides Serf City.
-The ending, with McDowell emerging as the hero of Risley’s ideal romance novel is a little cute for my taste but it works.
***1/2

FILM: THE 100 YEARS WAR
-A university extension course barely summarizes the conflict between the houses of Valois and Plantagenet.
-Fillerish, to be honest.  I can see what they were going for, but like “American Milk Association”, the execution didn’t really come anywhere close to the potential of the idea.
**
SHOW: THE LEATHER WEATHER REPORT
-Dominatrix Thelma Thunder (Denny Dillon) gives a BDSM-themed weather forecast with her masochistic weather map John (Charles Rocket).
-Ferris Butler originally wrote this sketch for his Manhattan cable show “Waste Meat News” in 1978 and rewrote it for SNL with Billy Brown and Mel Green.
-This sketch gets a bad reputation and is often used as the example of SNL ’80′s tendency to lean on shock and raunch for laughs.  It’s an easy target, though, and it’s nowhere the comedy abyss as everyone makes it out to be.
-Dillon seems to be really making the most out of her role and recovers nicely from the aerosol can “snow” malfunction”.  I did also like some of Charles’ comments.
-A lot of you are going to thinking I’m being generous with the ratings but while it’s not amazing (more notable for the subject matter than anything), it does succeed at what it aims to do.
***

SKETCH: COMMIE HUNTING SEASON
-In Greensboro, NC, the local redneck population is ready to get going on the first big Commie hunt in 20 years.
-According to Ferris Butler, this was Larry Arnstein and David Hurwitz’s sketch.
-Now this is just awful.  Likely the worst sketch of all time.  This was supposed to be a comment on the acquittal of the defendants in the Greensboro massacre, but it just fails on so many levels, and it ends up being more of a despicable comedy void than the Leather Weather Report was made out to be.   Once you know exactly what they were trying to do, it makes the sketch that much worse.
-This also has the single worst line in an SNL sketch ever: “All’s you got to do is shoot a Jew or [n-word].  Chances are, you’ll be getting a Commie anyway!”.  That line completely killed the sketch and there’s an eerie silence afterward as if they were waiting for an audience to laugh.  The darker than normal lighting doesn’t help.
-Any idea who any of the extras aside from Andy Murphy are?
-I rate this one star because no stars is no rating, and my system is exclusively one-to-five star.  It barely qualifies as one star.
*

FILM: THE ROCKET REPORT – 5th AVENUE
-Charles Rocket spontaneously talks to passers-by on 5th Avenue.
-The best part of what has turned out to be an awful show so far, and after a piece of shit like Commie Hunting Season provided much-needed laughs.
-I think this works so well because the show takes the opportunity of being in New York and working with Charles Rocket’s real strength with off-the-cuff, unrehearsed interactions, rather than shoehorning him into a faux-Chevy Chase role or having him do a bunch of impressions.
-Best moment: the older man who Rocket assumes is on drugs because he’s so happy.
****

SKETCH: JACK THE STRIPPER
-Dotty old prude Dame Lydia Snoot (Malcolm McDowell) and Dr. Woofta (Denny Dillon) investigate a wave of embarrassment caused by “Jack The Stripper”.
-Another terrible sketch.  Hill and Weingrad referred to it as the worst thing the show had done in their book Saturday Night, but this is a little better than Commie Hunting Season in that there’s a few ideas that could have worked if they were executed better.  As it was, though, it came off as a indecipherable mess and was still ultimately terrible.
-Joe Piscopo as “Carl Gustav The Stripper” (complete with cartoony Swedish accent) was so bad it was almost funny, but the reveal with the real Stripper being Prince Charles (Charles Rocket) just didn’t play well.
*

MUSICAL PERFORMANCE: “ASHTRAY HEART” – CAPTAIN BEEFHEART & THE MAGIC BAND
-A little more abrasive and complicated than the other song, but interesting nonetheless.
-Through the window behind Feldman, McDowell can be seen running up the stairs and opening a little door in the side of the stage.  You can also see a few other people run up (stage manager?).
-After Beefheart’s free jazz sax solo at the end, there’s dead silence for a few seconds before someone (Radames Pera according to this site) quite clearly yells “shit!”

FILM: “SOMEONE IS HIDING IN MY APARTMENT” – MITCHELL KRIEGMAN
-Mitchell tells of the weird goings-on that have convinced him there’s someone else in his apartment.
-Nothing great, but not offensive.  A gentler piece to cleanse the palate that succeeds at what it aims for.  Shame Kriegman didn’t last long at the show.
***

SHOW: THE WINE CELLAR
-Carolyn Parker (Denny Dillon) takes aim at the wine snobs by showing some foods work better with American wines.
-Far from brilliant, and the joke was done better with SCTV’s Don Perignon (The Beer Of Champagne) commercial parody three years before, but for what it is it’s alright.
-Denny at least brought a little energy to the proceedings, and it at least ends the show on a lighter note.
***

GOODNIGHTS
-Malcolm McDowell delivers his goodnight in a southern drawl.
-Don Pardo announces that two weeks from tonight, Ellen Burstyn will host with musical guest Aretha Franklin, and next week, “Roadshow” with John Candy and Tom Waits will appear in the SNL timeslot.  Apparently this was a pilot for a new show.  There’s a review available here.
-[Addendum: this is the final show for writers Sean Kelly and Nancy Dowd.  The backstage shakeups begin...] 

Final Summary:
Bad.  This episode is widely considered one of SNL’s all-time worst shows, and is easily the nadir of the season.  Dreck like Commie Hunting Season, Execution, Jack The Stripper and a mostly laugh-free Weekend Update weighed down a show that obscured the odd highlight here and there like some dense, joy-sucking substance.  It’s bad enough when a show has awful to mediocre material to begin with but this one actually seems to have a depressing aura about it.  It’s unfortunate, though, because had they had a stronger second outing, the critics and fans might not have been so quick to write them off.   As it was, this show only made the rest of the season more of an uphill battle.

EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:
-The Rocket Report
-Tobacco Grower’s Association
-Gothic Romance Novel Shop

EPISODE LOWLIGHTS:
-Commie Hunting Season
-Jack The Stripper
-Execution
-Weekend Update aside from Lennons and Piscopo
-Serf City
-Monologue
-100 Years War

MVP:
Denny Dillon

CAST & GUEST BREAKDOWN:
Denny Dillon: 6 appearances [Execution, Adopted Amy Carter, Weekend Update, Leather Weather Report, Jack The Stripper, The Wine Cellar]
Gilbert Gottfried: 5 appearances [Execution, Tobacco Grower's Association, Weekend Update, Commie Hunting Season, Jack The Stripper]
Gail Matthius: 2 appearances [Serf City, Adopted Amy Carter]
Joe Piscopo: 5 appearances [Execution, Mutually Omaha's Wild Kingdom, Weekend Update, Commie Hunting Season, Jack The Stripper]
Ann Risley: 2 appearances [Serf City, Gothic Romance Novel Shop]
Charles Rocket: 9 appearances [Execution, Mutually Omaha's Wild Kingdom, Serf City, Adopted Amy Carter, Weekend Update, Leather Weather Report, Commie Hunting Season, The Rocket Report, Jack The Stripper]

confirmed non-cast:
Yvonne Hudson: 1 appearance [Mutually Omaha's Wild Kingdom]
Mitchell Kriegman: 1 appearance [Someone Is Hiding In My Apartment]
Matthew Laurance: 1 appearance [Mutually Omaha's Wild Kingdom]
Neil Levy: 1 appearance [Serf City]
Andy Murphy: 2 appearances [Execution, Commie Hunting Season]
Eddie Murphy: 1 appearance [Mutually Omaha's Wild Kingdom]

guests:
Malcolm McDowell: 7 appearances [Monologue, Serf City, American Milk Association, Weekend Update, Gothic Romance Novel Shop, Commie Hunting Season, Jack The Stripper], 1 voice-over [The 100 Years War]
Captain Beefheart & The Magic Band: 2 appearances ["Hot Head", "Ashtray Heart"]

REBROADCAST HISTORY:
This episode was not rebroadcast on NBC.

Additional screen captures not seen above are available here